Connection and Conversion

“The human soul does not want to be advised or fixed or saved. It simply wants to be witnessed — to be seen, heard, and companioned exactly as it is.” - John O’Donohue

There's no scarcity of books and articles about running a successful business, contributing to the sense that there's a codified "right way" to run yours. So much of building a start-up involves looking at who's done this well before, and how their methods can be applied to your own process. It's helpful to check in with well-established reference points when you're learning things on the fly.

Enter Contact Relationship Management: a concept involving capturing people's info in one database, categorizing them, tracking your history with them, and guiding them (often without their knowledge or consent) through a journey you've predetermined the stages for.

I meet Mr. Fred Rogers, I tag his entry as "potential client", and then schedule my days around how to get him from "interested" to "informed" to "intrigued" to "invested". I'm so good at designing CRM systems that I came up with that alliteration off the top of my dome just now. I can make a system that funnels your leads all day, so automated and effective that you feel you're barely lifting a finger for these "closed won"s.

CRM tools are incredibly practical when meeting more people than your brain can contain. But they can be extractive and transactional as well. Let's take each aspect of a generic CRM system and see if we can make it better serve connection, not performance.

Data Collection + Storage

To me, this one was easy to shift. If I place everyone into a distinct category, I'm guaranteed to flatten the complexity of each person when I use the CRM system to recall them. So I've started using that obligatory "Notes" field at the end of each contact's info. I used to abhor the "Notes" section because anything written there usually meant "Miscellaneous". Systems do not stay simple when you add a "miscellaneous" layer to them. Think of your kitchen junk drawer. I hated mine so much I threw it in the trash - the actual, physical drawer into the garbage can - and now I keep its contents scattered throughout the house in their own little homes. But when it comes to people, the junk-drawer version of stored memory can be a wonderful, magical place. "Notes" is where I throw any miscellaneous info that stood out to me about a person. "Colorful dress", "passionate about sound baths", and "offered me to enter the room ahead of them" can be enough to remind me that this one name among many represents a person.

Automation + Communication

I'm mashing up these two CRM aspects because I've shifted the automation steps in my contact management toward notifying me to check in and away from the automation directly communicating on my behalf. When someone subscribes to my blog, for instance, instead of being sent an automated email, my automation saves an email draft and then pings me to edit it how I want and then send it. Even though I could make the process run without me, I want to be involved in the fun steps, and celebrating or thanking a new subscriber is one of the fun steps!

Analytics + Reporting

I'm going to be honest with you: you can pry the classic analytics and reporting aspect of CRM systems out of my cold, dead hands. A little (non-oppressive) pattern recognition never hurt a relationship, did it? And I wouldn't understand half what's going on in my business without some meta-level feedback in the form of numbers. What do you think? Is there a way to improve this aspect of CRM so that it better serves connection?

Workflow Management

This is the one that gets me emotional. Yes, I sometimes cry over the beauty of a workflow. I don't have a one-size-fits-all recommendation for making workflows more human, but I've noticed that when I'm using them to serve productivity, they can be harmful (think: pressure and performance) to my interactions with others. But when I use workflows to build capacity, they can be amazing at keeping me present and grounded, knowing my system has got my back.

Final Thoughts

Your struggle might be different than mine: you may be thinking, "I wish I was too organized like Bethany." Your superpowers might be that you can live the moment, observe people with wonder, and have the most chaotic junk drawer in your neighborhood. I hope that my coming from the other side of the imbalance helps you feel validated and gives you hope for a system that's just enough structure for you, rather than rigidly unforgiving. Wherever you are on this spectrum of human vs. robot, we're all just figuring this out and doing better when we know better.

Let me know if you need help! 30 minutes' free consultation with me can look however you want it to - even if you just want someone to vent to about "Miscellaneous" fields or robots.